Lately my exercise has been walking 5 miles 3 to 5 times a week. Ideally I should be running 26 miles a week but as you can see, in reality I’m only walking 15 to 25 miles a week.
My motivation has been wavering for a while now and I’m disturbed about it.
Motivate = するきにさせる
Encourage to do = すすめる
Waver = ゆれうごく
Disturbed = いらだたせる
I spent part of the day mopping then I remembered a poem I wrote way back in June of 2011.
Making Dreams Reality
I jog my first lap around the football field
A snail’s pace, so far, is my yield
A promise, to myself I have sealed
My dreams, to live, is my deal
I dig deeper for more energy
On/Off, On/Off, Walk/Jog, Walk/Jog, must be done patiently
Searching through memories
For what dreams be found lingering
I know somewhere there is more in me
At least that’s what my dreams told me
That I could run at lightening speeds
Winds, so strong, would carry me
So yes, I dream, at present, a dream it be
That ushers me on secretly
I tackle lap three
This is my reality
But in my dreams, I am so free
To run with the wind joyfully
Before I die, I’m going to be
Running with the wind amazingly!
After reading the poem I quite mopping and listened to a runrunlive podcast. By this point I felt a tiny bit more motivated and decided that, no matter what, I was going to run in the morning. Walking was not going to be allowed.
http://www.runrunlive.com/episode-3-275-mark-robert-sands-runs-366 (the podcast I listened to)
This morning November 12, 2013, I went to the tracks. The same tracks mentioned in the poem above. I stood there a while just looking out over the fields and I prayed,
“Dear God, please help me run 3 miles. I’ll be happy with 3 but I’d rather run 5, if you don’t mind, can I run 5?”
And do you know what? I did it. Actually I got a tiny bit more done than what I asked for. I just took it slowly and over a period of about an hour and 15 minutes I ran 6 miles. No walking at all.
Sometimes we hit this thing, some people call it a “Wall”, where you’ve done just enough to be satisfied but….
It isn’t your best. You know it isn’t. Like walking when you know you can run. But for some reason you become satisfied with less than your best. You haven’t properly caught hold of a “reason” to push for more.
As I said, some people call it a “Wall”. I call it, “Plateauing”.
Somewhere in your life, you looked up and saw a mountain that you wanted to climb. You liked the mountain and you were excited about climbing it. You started climbing. Then you came to a nice shady spot. It was real pretty and had a good view.
A plateau = こげん
You hang out there for a while. Take a rest. Enjoy the view. Some people really like plateaus. They never find any reason to leave the nice, cozy spot. They have everything they need right there. So they never look up again. They forget about the rest of the unclimbed mountain. Who needs the hassle? Right?
Something about that kind of mentality really grates against my heart and mind. I understand the effects a plateau can have on a person. I experience it just like everybody else. But some days it grates against my soul and I look up. I see the other half of the mountain looming over my head. The unfinished accomplishments, the goals half met staring down at me, beckoning me to remember them. I read my own writing about dreams and things I want, I read other people’s writing too. I listen to others talk about the dreams and goals in their life and I look up.
I look up and see my own mountains I haven’t finished climbing yet.
Go ahead, take a rest from time to time if you need to but don’t let “Rest” overtake you.
For God’s Sake Please, “Look Up! Don’t forget your dreams!”
“Wake up and do your thing, whatever it is. The world needs you. We need everybody running at there best!”
In closing I’d just like to add one more encouraging thing. Below is a post from a dailymile friend. I read it on the same day that I was having the struggles mentioned above. I found it so motivating that I asked him if I could repost it on my blog and he said yes.
great34 mi 05:52 10:20 pace
November 10, 2013 thoughtful 34 mile meditative run,”Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but also the worst habit you could possibly have. Look on the bright side you are strong, intelligent and a beautiful person. Above all everything is going to be all right. ”
Be encouraged, Julia French